Right Here
by Rhino7
Summary: This was why Cloud and Leon could never really be friends. Mentions of Clerith, Cloti, and Lefa


**Right Here**

**By Rhino7**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, its characters or storyline. This little thing is mine, as is Dr. Leng. So…alas…I'm trying to write more with the others in the Restoration Committee, not just Leon and Tifa…but it's hard because I love them so. But, this is my attempt at writing Cloud…again…**

**I don't really like Cloud. I don't HATE him or anything, he's just not my favorite. Every time I have him and Leon in a story together…Leon just wins (shrugs). Anyway, I tried really hard to write some Cloud objectively. Some bias slipped in there, but if you've read any of my stuff before, you've already braced yourself for that.**

**Anyway, musical muse for this one was Hurt, covered by Johnny Cash. The title is taken from the lyrics too. I have no affiliation or ownership of the song of any of that. It just seemed to fit Cloud in this situation. Enjoy!**

**..:-X-:..**

Yuffie was pacing a groove in the floor.

Aerith was drumming her fingers on the armrest of the chair.

Leon was scribbling on hospital paperwork.

Others in the lobby were making soft, agitated noises too: jumping knees, clicking pens, and biting nails.

Cloud observed all of this out of habit. He leaned against the wall, feeling conspicuous and out of place in the white, sterile ER lobby. His insides were churning and he was in a constant state of swallowing the urge to scream. The middle aged doctor had said she would send someone out periodically to fill them in, but it had been a while and there was no sign of—

His eyes caught on the clock behind the nurse's station. Just ten minutes had passed since Dr. Leng, chief of surgery at Radiant Garden Local Hospital, had told them that. He pursed his lips and looked at the group again.

They were all in various states of panic and worry. Just like the military training had taught him to be observant, it had also strictly drilled into him the ability to hide his emotions. There was no pacing or tapping or biting for him. The only other person in the lobby just as still and seemingly calm as him was Leon, but the other man also seemed too focused on that damn paperwork to be 'in' the situation.

Just an hour ago, a group of fire elemental Heartless had broken past Cid's claymore system and hit Ansem's office fast and hard. The monsters had nearly clogged the winding corridors completely, cutting Cid and Tifa—the only two people there at the time—off from any aid or escape.

The skirmish lasted for nearly half an hour before Cloud and Leon cut a path through the Heartless and Merlin doused the flames enough to get to the two. By then, Cid had been unconscious and Tifa had been screaming, half of her body in flames. They met Yuffie and Aerith at the hospital, and so began this horrible waiting game.

Cid was fine, all things considered. Mild concussion and a few deep scrapes. He was currently in the ER having the worst of them stitched closed. He had been conscious when Aerith last checked on him, she said, but grumbling and trying to bribe the nurses for a cigarette.

Needless to say, he wasn't having much luck there.

Tifa…God…Cloud closed his eyes briefly…Tifa had been all blood and burns. Dr. Leng had rushed her to the OR and Merlin had accompanied her. From what he could tell, in those brief moments that he and Leon got her and Cid out of that hellhole, most of the burns were concentrated on her arms and neckline, where she tried to shield herself from the elemental attacks. Her clothes had melted into her skin.

Leon had ordered Yuffie to go clean out the remaining Heartless from the scene: more to give the hyperactive girl something to do other than drive them all crazy in the lobby. She had returned after just fifteen minutes, saying that the Heartless had all fled the scene of the crime…and thus resumed her pacing.

Now…Now Dr. Leng and Merlin were in there…removing melted material and burned tissue from Tifa's body so they could heal her properly…and Cloud was being forced to stand out here and wait.

Patience had never been his strong suit.

Aerith sat forward, hands framing her face, elbows on her knees. Her shoulders were trembling. They had all ended up in the ER at one point or another in the past year, multiple times for many of them. But it had never been this extensive…He grimaced. Burn wounds were dangerous, relative to other wounds. He knew that all too well.

A nurse in flowery scrubs stepped into the lobby. Every pair of eyes there snapped to her, and the woman faltered for a split second at the attention…So she was new at this…Not comforting.

"Cid Highwind?" She offered.

"Yes?" Aerith stood.

Yuffie stopped pacing, but the other eyes in the lobby returned to their anxiety, waiting for news of their own loved ones. Leon had never looked up from the clipboard. His disinterest was starting to annoy Cloud.

"He's…He's all right." The nurse began. "Two of the lacerations on his arms required stitching, but they've been taken care of and he's been started on a round of antibiotics."

"But he's okay?" Yuffie moved to Aerith's side, eyes wide.

"Yes." The nurse replied calmly, "Normally we would ask that he stay for a night of observation, but…"

"But what?" Aerith pressed.

The nurse offered a small smile, "He's adamant about being released now."

Aerith deflated slightly and Yuffie exhaled heavily. "Yup, he's all right."

"Now, the pain killers we used are…still in effect…so…" The nurse was speaking delicately.

"He's loopy." Cloud filled in for her. "And probably being a nuisance, right?"

Yuffie snorted, while Aerith looked exasperated. The nurse, however, looked grateful that he'd said it so she wouldn't have to.

"Yuffie, take Cid home." Leon joined the conversation.

"Wha-?" Yuffie spun to face him, where he was still sitting, "You heard! He's loopy and you want ME to handle him when he's like that?"

"Aerith, go with her." Leon looked up.

Aerith turned. "I'm waiting to hear about Tifa."

"We'll call you when we hear something." Leon said, shooting a quick Back Me Up glance to Cloud.

He nodded, looking seriously to Aerith, "I will."

Aerith swallowed, "But—"

"You're either going to worry here or worry at Merlin's." Leon said, "At least Merlin's is more comfortable."

"That's not better!" Yuffie snapped, "What if something happens? No, I want to be here."

Aerith, however, didn't look as certain. She looked to Cloud. "You'll call if either of you hear ANYTHING?"

He nodded firmly. "I promise."

Cloud was surprised that his promise meant anything to Aerith anymore, but he was grateful when she bobbed her head, accepting his word. She turned to calm Yuffie down, and Cloud caught Leon eying him: not quite as trusting of 'his word' as Aerith was.

After getting an equal promise out of Leon, Yuffie was placated and Aerith steered her toward the ER to collect Cid. Cloud could almost hear the older man swearing from here, and for a moment, he envied the girls for having that distraction from the waiting.

He back stepped and sank into Aerith's vacated chair, not looking at Leon. The other man was going to judge him with or without that promise, so Cloud just ignored him. They were combat buddies, and he trusted Leon with his life, but that didn't mean they had to get along outside the battlefield.

After a beat, Cloud saw Leon return his attention to his paperwork in his periphery. Sure, the man hadn't been outright hostile to him for a while, and Cloud guessed he had Tifa to thank for that. He and Leon were of like mind in a lot of ways: battle, strategy, priority, and social convention. The truly important matters, they could agree on how to handle. But there were blind spots: most prominently, Tifa.

He could never make the other man understand the situation with Sephiroth. He could explain and explain and explain—which he didn't because it was a waste of time—and Leon would still only conclude that Cloud had left Aerith and Tifa and put them through emotional Hell to fight his darkness 'or whatever'. That wasn't what made Leon give him the cold shoulder.

It was the fact that Cloud had fallen in love with Aerith and virtually left Tifa out to dry. It had never and would never be his intention to hurt Tifa…She had been his best friend growing up and the fact that she was hurting nearly tore him apart…The Hell did Leon know about Cloud's relationship with Tifa?

But he could not and would not pretend to be in love with Tifa to spare her feelings. It was an insult to her—and Tifa didn't slap like normal girls, she would dislocate your jaw with a right hook. It sounded harsh, but he didn't know how to handle that situation. At one point, yes, he had had deep feelings for Tifa…but after the Heartless and the war…and Aerith…That window had closed.

Yes, he had avoided her when he was hunting Sephiroth…What was he supposed to do? Drag her into his inner battle? Force her to fight his demons for him? She would have, and she would have gotten herself hurt or killed…He couldn't risk that. Unfortunately, Tifa—and later Leon—had read this as apathy or detachment. They didn't understand that he was trying to protect her!

Aerith probably didn't understand either, but she heard him out about it. She wasn't happy about being forced on the sidelines, but she hadn't been as angry…as furious…as Tifa. And after his and Tifa's massive fight last year…things had just fallen apart. Tifa wouldn't talk to Cloud and she wouldn't talk to Aerith—who was guilty by association in her book.

But she talked to Leon.

Cloud wasn't sure what to think about that development. Part of him knew he had no right to an opinion on the matter—not after what he put her through. The other part of him—the majority—was confused and a little aggravated about it. The two had barely known each other when the big fight happened, and from what little conversation he and Leon had had, he gauged Leon to be just as adept at conversation as Cloud was. Suddenly the man was Tifa's confidante?

More than that…It was becoming exponentially more irritating at how damn nonchalant Leon was being. Tifa had been nearly burned alive, and he was sitting there, calm as you please, filling out damn paperwork. Considering how supposedly 'close' Leon and Tifa were as of late, he was infuriatingly calm. Then again, Cloud was familiar with this act.

Tough guy. Aerith told him constantly that he was an expert at it. That façade of being a hardass in the worst case situations. She told him that his weak point was his eyes; apparently they were an 'open book'. He wasn't sure what to think about that…only that Leon definitely wasn't an 'open book'. In fact, he looked downright uninterested in Tifa's condition.

"Is she okay?" He found himself blurting out.

Leon didn't respond, didn't look up.

"Hey." He said, raising his voice a notch. "Is Tifa okay?"

"I don't know…That's why we're waiting out here." Leon lifted his eyes from the paperwork, speaking as though Cloud was a slow person.

Cloud frowned, "No, not—I mean…" He gave a vague gesture. "In general."

Leon's eyes were like iron curtains, giving away nothing. "Why?"

Cloud bristled, "Because…she doesn't talk to me and I…I'm worried about her."

Leon made a small noise that could have meant a thousand things, and promptly returned his attention to the paperwork.

Thoroughly exasperated now, Cloud faced the other man. "She's my friend too. So don't act like—"

"Is she?" Leon looked up again.

"What is that supposed to—"

"She doesn't talk to you because she has nothing left to say to you." Leon stood, clipboard in hand. "She has nothing left to say to you because you left. Suddenly you show up expecting hugs and answers?" He shook his head, handing the paperwork to the nurse at the station, facing Cloud again. "What do you want from her?"

Cloud stood as well now. "I left to protect her."

"From what?" Leon narrowed his eyes fractionally. "From this 'darkness'? From Sephiroth? From you? From what?"

"From everything." Cloud retaliated, "I did what I had to do—I'm tired of explaining this."

Leon folded his arms. "It smells like abandonment to me."

"I don't care what you think." Cloud exhaled, "I was protecting her. And Aerith."

"So you keep saying." He replied.

"You think you're better than me at this, huh?" Cloud faced him fully. "You think your Tough Guy act isn't pushing her away as much as my leaving did?"

"There's a difference." Leon said quietly.

"It smells like disinterest to me." Cloud snapped.

"Yeah, but I'm HERE." Leon retorted. The 'and you weren't' was thinly veiled.

"You play tough guy long enough, Tifa will eventually think you don't care too." Cloud argued, feeling the others' eyes on them now, but not particularly caring. This was a long time coming.

"She knows I care."

"How?" Cloud pressed. "Because you're here to listen to her and say the right things? We don't all have the luxury of being around for that."

"No." Leon said evenly. "She knows because I'm here when things get difficult. When we argue, she fights me directly, not my answering machine."

"Excuse me." Merlin's voice interrupted.

Both warriors turned as the tottery old sorcerer stepped out of the OR hallway, looking pale but optimistic. Argument put on hold, Cloud faced Merlin with Leon, equally focused on what the old wizard had to say.

"Is…everything all right?" Merlin asked, looking from one to the other.

"Fine. What about Tifa?" Cloud pushed to the point.

Merlin fidgeted. "She's all right—Dr. Leng and I removed all of the burned and melted material…The burns were…more extensive than we thought…It will take a few days of healing treatment to close all of the wounds."

Cloud's heart crashed into his throat and he nearly choked on it. The silent fear that Tifa wouldn't make it had ballooned in his chest and Merlin's words punctured it, allowing it to deflate. He breathed a little easier, but only a little.

"Dr. Leng sent me out to tell you…She's in there treating the burns now…" Merlin glanced around, "Where are the others?"

"Yuffie and Aerith took Cid home." Leon informed. "Where is she?"

"She's been transferred to the Burn Unit." Merlin lifted a hand, "But she's not very lucid at the moment…" He paused hesitantly.

"What?" Cloud felt the balloon threaten to inflate again.

"She asked for you, Cloud." Merlin said carefully.

It felt as though an ice cube had slipped down his throat and settled in his stomach. Tifa was delirious, burned, and in pain. He had forgotten that she used to ask about him every time she was in the ER. It all went back to an accident when they were kids.

They had been horsing around in an abandoned old house. The structure had caved in and Tifa had dropped through two stories of bad flooring before landing on a moth eaten couch. She had broken her arm and three ribs. Her parents had been out of town, and she had been delirious then too…So she'd asked and asked the nurses if he was okay until Cloud showed up to reassure her himself.

The fact that she still did this when delirious in an ER made his chest hurt.

Leon didn't know any of this, and though he gave no outward reaction, Cloud felt the urge to apologize to him for some reason. Instead, however, he looked to Merlin.

"Where is she?" He asked.

Merlin led him down the corridor of the Burn Unit to one of the exam rooms. The wing smelled like antiseptic and treated plastic. He hated hospitals. The room where Tifa was being treated felt like it was at the farthest possible location in the wing. When they reached it, Merlin wordlessly gestured to it, gave him pat on the arm like a grandfather might, and helplessly walked away.

Cloud was barely aware of his exit and walked into the exam room. Tifa was lying on her back on the bed. Dr. Leng, a woman with blond hair in the process of turning gray, was seated beside the bed, bent over Tifa's shoulder as she cleaned the burns.

Tifa's head was turned away, eyes closed. The skin of her face, neck, collar, and shoulders were red with the burns. Her arms were a deeper shade of red, charred and angry. She looked enormously better than she had when she was brought in, but still too injured and vulnerable to set Cloud at ease. Her destroyed clothes had been removed, and she was covered by a surgical gown, pulled down just enough for Dr. Leng to properly clean the injuries on her shoulders.

He felt very out of place.

"She's asleep." Dr. Leng greeted, looking up from her work. "Fell asleep not too long ago. Come on in."

Exhaling breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, Cloud stepped into the room, eyes on Tifa. "Asleep."

"It's a good thing." Dr. Leng said, returning her eyes to her task. "The worst of it is over. I'll start the healing treatments in the morning, after her body has recovered from the shock and she regains consciousness."

Something about the doctor's tone made Cloud feel unwelcome.

"Merlin said she asked for me." He offered, as though to defend his presence here.

"She always does." Dr. Leng replied softly, moving some of Tifa's hair aside to reach the burns on the back of her neck.

"Always…"

"Tifa has been admitted to the ER fourteen times in the past eight months." The doctor said. "Every time, it has been outpatient. Battle wounds, broken bones, nothing this…extensive."

Cloud didn't say anything, sensing that the woman was going somewhere with this, though he wasn't sure he'd like where her point was.

"Fourteen times…fifteen now." She said, looking up again. "Guess who's been here every single time."

He pursed his lips. Today was going to be one of those days he got attacked on all sides. Fine. He was used to that. At least Tifa was all right. That was all he cared about at the moment.

"She comes in. We call her emergency contact. He comes in." Dr. Leng resumed her ministrations again. "He fills in the paperwork, talks to the authorities. He waits. He helps her get dressed and he takes her home." She paused. "And every single time, she asks about you first."

"If you're trying to make me feel guilty…" Cloud narrowed his eyes.

"I'm sorry." The woman sighed, "That's not my intention."

"Then what? Because it's not my fault she asks—"

"I'm not going to pretend to know what happened between you two. It's none of my business." Dr. Leng said, setting her tools aside and starting to wrap the wounds.

"Damn straight." Cloud said quietly.

"But Tifa has been my patient just as often as Leon has been." She went on. "So believe me when I say that the place at her side is no longer yours."

"How many times," He said lowly, "do I have to explain—"

Dr. Leng rubbed her forehead. "I'm sorry. I'm being harsh. I'm just a conscientious observer in the whole matter…I'm sure you had your reasons…She asks for you when she's delirious…but she asks for him as soon as she wakes up."

"Why are you telling me this?" He asked. "I know that she and Leon are close. I know I failed at being there for her—"

"It's not about what you did and didn't do, Cloud." Dr. Leng lifted a hand, "This isn't my place to talk about this—"

"Then don't." Cloud bit out.

Dr. Leng closed her mouth, finished bandaging Tifa's wounds, and stood. "She's going to need help during recovery. With everything. Help that you can't give her." She walked toward the door, "She's going to ask for Leon when she wakes up."

**..:-X-:..**

Twenty minutes later, Tifa was still asleep, but Cloud was getting restless just sitting there with her. She had asked for him on instinct, not because she really wanted him there. Tifa and Dr. Leng had made clear who she relied on nowadays. Cloud didn't blame her, couldn't really, but it still hurt…mostly because he knew he had brought it upon himself.

"I'm sorry." He murmured, standing from her bedside after sitting for a while.

Tifa didn't respond, still sleeping. That was probably best. If his being here was painful to her, he didn't want to be here. Then again, he wanted to be here, because he so often hadn't been…It was confusing, all of these emotions headbutting inside him.

So he went to find Leon.

The other man wasn't in the lobby. The nurse said he had filled out the paperwork, made a phone call—to Aerith, probably, since Cloud had forgotten—and abruptly walked out. Perplexed, Cloud glanced around. It was uncharacteristic of Leon to leave.

He was just turning to start looking down the hallway when somebody walked out of the mens' restroom on the side of the lobby. As the door swung inward, he spotted Leon, bent over the sink, one hand on either side of it, looking like he'd just gotten sick.

Alarm flashed up Cloud's spine but he didn't move. He wouldn't appreciate being walked in on in that condition, so he figured Leon wouldn't either. Instead, he crossed the lobby and waited. When Leon emerged a minute later, he still looked pale, but his eyes honed in on Cloud and he straightened immediately.

"Well?" He asked, walking over.

Cloud felt momentarily wrong footed. "She's stable. Sleeping."

The iron curtain had briefly been pulled back, and Leon nodded, "Good."

Cloud tried not to look at him too long, but he suddenly preferred that iron curtain, because what he was seeing…It was forming a pit in his stomach.

"She'll…she'll need you when she wakes up." He said after a moment, looking away.

This was why he and Leon weren't fully functioning friends. Cloud could stomach the idea of protecting those he cared about from a distance. Leon protected them by being there, at all times. When it came to Tifa, they were both blind, for different reasons.

Cloud wanted to keep her safe because she was his oldest friend.

Leon wanted to protect her because he was falling in love with her.

"What room?" It was spoken as understandingly as Leon could, he presumed.

"212." Cloud replied.

Without another word exchanged, Leon headed in that direction. There was nothing left to say anyway. Cloud exhaled heavily. This wasn't his place anymore. He had always needed Tifa, and Tifa had always needed him. Then suddenly he hadn't been there. Now Tifa needed Leon, and he knew Leon needed her too. Cloud wasn't part of the equation anymore.

And he wasn't sure how to handle that.

So he did what seemed appropriate…what seemed like the proper thing to do at the moment.

He left.

**..:-X-:..**

**A/N:** Bah! So much sloppy! (head/desk) This is as good as it gets, ladies and gents. The last bit was rushed…I felt like I rambled enough. I like Lefa…you get it, by now. If you'll gently let me know what I did wrong—and I know I did something—I'll do my darndest to improve! Constructive feedback is appreciated!


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